Selection Stories
I’ve wanted to discuss mental health for a long time, particularly to understand what people genuinely feel on this topic. Recently, I came across various psychologists on Instagram, inviting them to share their thoughts, hoping to have meaningful conversations. Among them, Veena Nair, a Clinical Psychologist based in Pune with over 8 years of experience, kindly agreed to share her insights. She specializes in adult psychotherapy, providing trauma-informed, queer-affirmative, and strength-based therapy through her practice, Evergro. Along with her team, she offers inclusive mental health care, supervises therapists, and advocates for mental health awareness. Currently she work remotely, and people can reach to her via her website or directly at veena.nair@evergro.in .
I’d like to extend my thanks to Veena Ji for her willingness to contribute. Now, let’s dive into our conversation.
Q1) What inspire you to peruse a career in psychology?
Veena: I’ve always been curious about the human mind and how people navigate life’s challenges. That curiosity evolved into a passion for helping others through therapy. Witnessing the transformative power of mental health care inspired me to create a space where people feel seen, supported, and empowered to heal and grow.
Q2. What does a typical day in your life look like?
Veena: My day involves a predictable routine of client sessions, supervising therapists, and some behind-the-scenes work for my practice. I’m quite homely and value quiet time with myself, which includes fitness and reading outside of work. Maintaining this balance helps me stay grounded and focused.
Q3. How much water do you make a conscious effort to drink every day?
Veena: That’s a pointed question! I don’t keep a strict count of my water intake, but since my work involves a lot of talking, I keep a 1-liter bottle that I refill multiple times a day. I sip regularly throughout the day, even during sessions, to stay hydrated.
Q4. How many hours do you usually sleep?
Veena: Usually aim for around 7 to 8 hours of sleep each night. It helps me recharge and stay focused for my work and personal routine.
Q5. What is your biggest realization so far?
Veena: My biggest realization is that I cannot make everyone happy, and that’s perfectly okay. It’s essential to be respectful and avoid injustice, especially to myself, as bitterness can arise from neglecting my own needs. I’ve learned to take charge wherever possible to avoid living with regret.
Q6. Can you recommend 2-3 books that have had a profound impact on your life or perspective?
Veena: I would recommend a few impactful books. I have a bias towards fiction, as it helps us delve into others’ narratives with depth. “The Gift of Therapy” offers invaluable insights, “Man’s Search for Meaning” profoundly explores resilience, and I cherish the “Harry Potter” series for its rich storytelling and themes of courage and friendship.
Q7. What is your worst habit?
Veena: I consider my worst habit to be people pleasing, as it has led to several guilt-ridden decisions, along with a lot of regrets and resentment. It’s taken me years to learn how to live life for myself, but helping clients on their journeys has also deepened my connection with myself.
Q8. How do you build and maintain long-lasting relationships?
Veena: I build and maintain long-lasting relationships by taking things slowly but consistently. I believe people naturally reconnect, so I don’t worry about not being in touch regularly. My friends and relatives understand that I might disappear at times due to the heaviness of my work, but we have mutual trust and respect, and we support each other during tough times, which keeps our relationships strong.
Veena: A common misconception about psychology is that psychologists can read minds and lead perfect lives. In reality, we can’t read minds and may sometimes be just as misguided in our own lives. Many of us take therapy ourselves, but being in this field does make us more perceptive.
Q11.What are 3-4 basic steps that anyone, regardless of their socio-economic status, can take to maintain good mental health?
Veena: To maintain good mental health, regardless of socio-economic status, it’s crucial to reflect on four major domains: appetite, exercise, sleep, and interpersonal relationships. While financial, professional, and academic aspects are important for sustenance, the basics cannot be ignored, as they significantly enhance our quality of life.
Q12. I’m just a regular guy, what can I do to help spread mental health awareness?
Veena: To help spread mental health awareness, reach out to others and don’t dismiss those who are struggling. While mental health has gained attention since COVID, it’s still often invalidated. Reaching out when you’re not feeling well and extending kindness to others in tough times is one of the best things we can do for ourselves and for them.
Q13. What steps can I take if my friend is struggling with mental health issues? Is treatment available in any hospital, or are there specialized hospitals for mental health?
Veena: If your friend is struggling with mental health issues, it’s essential to be available and supportive, as everyone is different and may need different types of help. Encourage them to seek professional assistance if necessary, but don’t coerce them into treatment, as this can lead to resistance unless there’s a risk of self-harm or harm to others. Everyone has the right to choose their form of help. Psychologists and psychiatrists are available in private clinics or hospitals, depending on individual needs.
Q14. How to say no without feeling guilty?
Veena: To say no without feeling guilty, just start by saying no. Demands and expectations never really end, and the first time is often the hardest. However, with consistent practice, we can recognize the importance of setting boundaries and eventually break free from the guilt that society teaches us.
Q15. What is your definition of success?
Veena: I don’t see success as an end goal. Life has its ups and downs, and for me, success is about finding a balance between contentment and consistent growth.
Q16. What is life according to you?
Veena: I wish there were a universal answer to what life is. To me, it’s a mixed bag of experiences—our learnings, achievements, feelings, discoveries, and even our sadness and anxieties, both alone and with others. Figuring it out means understanding and pursuing our goals while also focusing on regulation and compassion.
———–Thank You———
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